Say what?

I'm guessing most of you aren’t subscribers to Pediatrics magazine, so I'll give you a major scoop from the latest issue. The folks at Pediatric are reporting on a study that finds ... drum roll, please ... fat kids get picked on more than skinny kids in school. I know, it's a stunner. I'm wondering how much good could be done with all the money that is spent on “no sh!#” studies. I mean, there have been studies financed to determine that exercise helps people lose weight and that people are not as honest online as they are in person. And how much money was spent over many decades to find out that smoking is bad for us? Holy cow. They could have given me a million dollars, and I would have been glad to tell them that sucking hot, chemical-laden smoke into one's lungs could have a negative effect. I hear the folks at Pediatrics have a blockbuster coming next month. Word has it that their researchers have determined that learning to crawl and walk upright improves babies’ mobility. You heard it here first.