Wednesday, February 13, 2008

Now THIS is collaborating with the enemy

Just when you thought the proliferation of ridiculously large, gas-guzzling vehicles such as Humvees and those monstrous SUVs that can carry entire soccer teams had reached its peak, a company called Alton Manufacturing has one-upped, or maybe even 100-upped, the competition. Alton has taken an already beastly Ford super-duty truck and turned it into the mother of all SUVs. It's called the Alton F-650 XUV, and it features a 42-speaker sound system, two 16-inch TVs suspended from the ceiling and, if that weren't enough, a 42-inch plasma TV. If you would like to take your work on the road with you, there are four computer work stations. Then it gets really ridiculous. The "vehicle" also is equipped with a train horn and features hardwood floors. All of this is hauled down the highway by a 7.2-liter Caterpillar diesel engine. There's simply no defense for, number one, building such a monstrosity, and number two, anyone actually driving one. We have seen the misery this country has suffered because of our virtual slavery at the hands of foreign oil producers, from the sheiks in the Middle East to the world-class lunatic Hugo Chavez in Venezuela. One would hope that those with the means to buy this vehicle - which goes for something in the neighborhood of $200,000 - or other similarly indefensible behemoths would instead buy the most fuel-efficient car, truck or SUV that meets their basic needs and put the rest of that money to a better use. In other words, maybe use some of that excess cash to help the less fortunate, rather than those already making fortunes from the stupidity, greed and egomania of millions of Americans. It sure beats shambling around in the afterlife, laden with chains like Jacob Marley's ghost.



Anonymous Harry Funk said...

I expect to see one of these monstrosities driven soon by a Peters Township mother taking the kids to tennis practice.

February 16, 2008 at 9:18 AM  

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