Monday, July 14, 2008

I'd rather walk to Phoenix...


Ok, so I'm as pro-security as the next guy, but this is retarded. Homeland Security may be considering a Tazer-type bracelet that ALL airline passengers would have to wear during their flight. The bracelet would be equipped with GPS and would provide personal information as well as the whereabouts of the passenger and his/her luggage (at 30,000 feet, I assume the passenger is within a 231 foot cylinder...). But, the kicker (shocker?) is that if a hijacking event unfolds, the bracelets can be activated and specific bracelets can be ordered to shock the sh!t of the wearer. It takes some huge cajones to take on this kind of liability...

Here is the story:



Here is a google search of "Taser Deaths":




Isn't 200 non-terrorists with the image of 9-11 burned into their mind enough to prevent the majority of in-air events? Isn't the threat of accidentally electrocuting a 90 year old woman enough of a deterrent?

-ellipses

12 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

When I first read this article, I thought they were going to threaten to show the mediocre Wes Craven thriller "Shocker" to deter air rage. Now that I realize its a stun bracelet, I'm not as confident in the effectiveness.

-Abomb

July 14, 2008 at 1:51 PM  
Blogger Ellipses said...

People would be jamming paper clips into them and soaking their arms with water TRYING to get shocked... What would they be made of? Hopefully something that can't be cut off with a box cutter that someone smuggled onboard in their "cavity."

-ellipses

July 14, 2008 at 1:53 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

actually, I would pay to see a couple of 90-year-old women electrocuted.

July 14, 2008 at 3:36 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Alternatively, an airline employee could simply administer the shocker to a rowdy passenger.

-Abomb

July 14, 2008 at 3:58 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This is getting really old. Ellipses, when are you done filling in for Brant?

I want Brant back. Hurry!

July 14, 2008 at 4:03 PM  
Blogger Ellipses said...

Abomb... "administer the shocker" is borderline profane...

Google "shocker" :-)

...

And to anon... don't worry... Brant will be back at the end of the week... I am sorry that I have tied you to a chair, safety pinned your eyelids open, and forced you to read this.

-ellipses

July 14, 2008 at 4:07 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

No, not at all, you wouldn't have that power. I actually check every day to see if Brant has surfaced. I don't post nor read your junk. I am just getting anxiouis for intelligence to return to this blog.

July 14, 2008 at 4:15 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

No need to reply--I won't be reading it. I will be back at the end of the week with Brant.
Thanks for the information.

July 14, 2008 at 4:18 PM  
Blogger Ellipses said...

Eatin' dawgs ain't sofistikated 'nuff fer ya? I see how it is...

-ellipses

July 14, 2008 at 4:19 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ellipses,

I was aware of the meaning of the shocker. It was part of the joke. ;)

-Abomb

July 14, 2008 at 4:35 PM  
Anonymous Captain said...

The 90 year old must be some bad characters to need to be shocked. Truthfully, I would have liked to seem some middle aged folks shocked instead. Should I care about this possibility? I think or hope like all intelligent people that this will never be necessary in our society. But then consider the other side of the coin: Is there ever a need for such weaponry and submission tactics? I think there is. Unfortunately other than the unruly passenger, scantily clad women or the autistic children who get thrown off planes I cant think of any other need. Lets try this: Make the arrest for the unruly, idiot passenger truly shock him when he gets years in federal prison and must pay the appropriate reparations and for the Autistic child (of which my son is) lets finally get some satisfaction and get studies which truly give some hope to these great children/young adults/adults who are afflicted. As for the scantily clad, no comment, it might erupt shockingly another great debate or worse and my wife would not like it. And the shocker here would be that society needs to be more tolerant of differences especially if they dont impact your life at that moment. Not all differences are visible. Take a chance and learn something from their exposure to you -- can you say osmosis? Just like the old addage goes "Two people in a room and one is an idiot -- make sure you keep your mouth shut to not be identified" or something to that effect.

Look, the humor here only goes to state the obvious to me and hopefully you also. If you dont like the humor others have thats okay. But dont be such a party pooper. Take two aspirins, a shot of your fav anything and let us know how your feeling tomorrow - you must have had a very bad day. In other words EASE UP GRUMPY! When Brant comes back maybe his vacation ending will allow you to go back to your regular self -- fully leaded and shockingly sterile.

And no I am not defending E as he can do that himself much better than I ever could. But if you cant stand a differing opinion dont even give yours as we may not care about it either, unless you truly have something insightful or humorous to say.....than theres a possibility...but in the slight chance you are going to be back and read this then add some intelligence to the blog with your insight and perspective on anything you wish....I will let E pin my eyelids open and tie me to my chair so to adequately ingest, partially digest, regurgitate perhaps and utilize your wisdom.....OK enough already :)

July 15, 2008 at 2:22 AM  
Anonymous Captain said...

PS: I live in Phoenix, its damn hot, humid past few days and the economy is about as bad as the humor in this blog. Stay at home, your feet will thank you for it.

July 15, 2008 at 2:24 AM  

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