Tuesday, August 26, 2008

For cripe's sake, get a grip!

A country politician made the mistake recently of making a backwoods joke with a woman and her two young nieces in a Harlan, Ky., grocery store. Otis "Bullman" Hensley, who the AP says has gained attention with his oddball tactics as a fringe candidate in the last two Kentucky gubernatorial races, encountered the woman and the two girls, ages 11 and 13, when he went to the store to pick up some ground beef for his wife last week. "I offered to trade her a fattening hog for those girls," said Hensley. "I meant it as a joke. I've said it a million times. Most people get a kick out of it." Most. But not this woman. Her family got a local prosecutor, who must be the world's biggest buttwipe, to issue a warrant for Hensley's arrest, accusing him of trying to entice the children into illegal sexual activity. Hensley told the Lexington Herald-Leader that he tried to explain the situation to the Harlan County attorney's office, but "they wouldn't listen." After some discussion and consultation, Hensley apologized to the family for any offense they might have taken, and the prosecutor dropped the case. The girls' father, apparently realizing that his family looks like a bunch of idiots, declined to comment after the case was resolved. While waiting for things to get sorted out, Hensley spent three days in jail, but he should consider himself lucky. A conviction could have landed him behind bars for 10 years. Appalachian scholar Loyal Jones told the AP that Hensley's jest has been around for generations. "I've heard many variations of that," said Jones. "You might hear, 'That's a good-looking boy; I'd trade you a pocket knife for him.' ... Political correctness has ruined country humor." Ain't that the truth. Another problem we have is parents who are overly hysterical about any perceived threat to their children's safety. Also, you have a lot of city people moving to the country who have no idea what a fattening hog is. In fact, some of them might have trouble telling the difference between a pig and a goat. Said Hensley, "Jay Leno makes jokes every night and makes millions. I make one joke and go to jail." Welcome to life in America, 2008.



Anonymous Anonymous said...

Damnit, if I weren't married, I'd use THAT as a pickup line!

-ellipses... would trade a pig for a beer and a cigarette right now

August 26, 2008 at 3:30 PM  

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