Thursday, April 9, 2009

Who do you think is the cat's pajamas?


Even those of us who are happily married sometimes cast a sideways glance at an attractive member of the opposite sex who crosses our path. Some folks might actually stare with their mouths hanging open. Heck, even pious Jimmy Carter admitted to committing adultery in his heart. Some people, men and women alike, have a fascination with celebrities, whether they be music stars, movie stars or just those folks who have no discernable talents (at least ones I can mention here) and are famous for being famous (see Paris Hilton). I’m not much of a star-worshipper. I regularly see women in Washington County who seem to me to be as attractive as most of those on the silver screen. I will take time out of my busy schedule to gawk if images of Scarlett Johansson (above) or Christina Ricci are easily accessible, but I’ve never understood why some men think Jennifer Garner is hot, and I am absolutely stunned that Sarah Jessica Parker is a Hollywood star. I mean, the woman (again, just in my opinion) is borderline homely, and her acting skills have never, ever been compared to Meryl Streep’s. Some men will tell you that they never look in an admiring way at any woman other than their wives. Here’s the deal. I don’t believe you. And you women, don’t pretend that you’re above all this. We men know that if Johnny Depp or Hugh Jackman came a-callin’, the next thing we’d hear from you might come in the form of a letter from a divorce lawyer. For most people, it’s harmless fantasy. We truly love the people we’re married to, and we’d actually turn down Scarlett or Johnny if they showed up at our doors (not that I bear any delusions that Scarlett Johansson will suddenly develop a taste for old, fat guys with no money; I do, however, hear that old fat guys with a boatload of money do pretty well for themselves). But I digress. Share with me and the readers of the blog your picks for the celebrities who mesmerize you, and those who are sex symbols for reasons you’ve never been able to figure out. And while we’re at it, tell us about someone you secretly find highly alluring, even though people would probably think you’re crazy. I’ll go first: It’s Flo, the lady in the Progressive insurance commercials. She raises my deductible.

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28 Comments:

Blogger Ellipses said...

I think the marketing of "it" girls and guys goes through phases... in the 90's... they seem to have made stars out of average looking chicks who were always cast in "sweet personality" role... Not like... holy sh#$ look at the $%#& on her!...

Sarah Jessica Parker is one of those... Sandra Bullock is another... Irish guys are another... irish guys don't look like irish movie stars

As far as capital H O T stars are concerned... Anne Hathaway is beautiful and Brad Pitt is who I'd give a kidney to look like...

Cameron Diaz never did it for me... and I don't know why Gwenneth Paltrow was such an icon... she is a good actress... but the fawning over her was not 100% because of her thespian talents...

Sean Connery. Why? Seriously... I have gone back to the Bond days and I don't see it.

April 9, 2009 at 1:02 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'd have to vote for the singer-actress Zooey Deschanel, Mia Kirshner (who I think might be playing on the "other team," alas), Natalie Portman, and, yeah, I'm with Ellipses on Anne Hathaway. What a beautiful smile...

--Brad Hundt

April 9, 2009 at 1:48 PM  
Blogger {cher} said...

I'll never in a million years understand the SJP fascination, as even in her commercials, I think she's alien looking. I don't even consider her average.. hehe

Anne Hathaway and Jessica Biel are beautiful. Haley Berry is another one I adore. The girls that without makeup, still look amazing!!

As far as what I've been pining/obsessed with? I have boy-next-door preferences. I find Paul Rudd and Dane Cook sexy and accessible. Heck, I've even found Kevin Smith and Jack Black attractive in big teddy bear kind of ways. (If you saw a pic of my husband you'd see .. LOL.)

I'm probably one of the few that don't think Angelina Jolie is sexy. Unless she gets lots of botox or something, I don't see those facial features aging gracefully! hehe

Oh well, who am I to talk eh? lol

April 9, 2009 at 1:53 PM  
Blogger Ellipses said...

Brad... you have a thing for dominant brunettes, huh? I had to google mia and zooey... but put them next to hathaway and you have a pretty obvious theme going on there... :-)

I didn't know who anne hathaway was until I watched Get Smart... and then I was all like "Oh THAT'S that chick with the boyfriend who did that stuff!"

Whatever... she could push old ladies into traffic and I'd still wanna stare into them purty eyes.

April 9, 2009 at 2:03 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oh, here's another one -- Norah Jones! How could I have forgotten her...

--Brad Hundt

April 9, 2009 at 2:08 PM  
Blogger Brant said...

Zooey Deschanel. Good one, Brad. And she has a nice set of pipes, too. (She can sing.) Natalie Portman. Yes, again. But I've never found Anne Hathaway attractive. She has that Audrey Hepburn look, and I just never thought she was all that. And Cher, I agree with you about Angelina Jolie. Don't see the attraction. That's what makes life interesting, though. We all have different tastes, and even without our own tastes, we sometimes seem to contradict ourselves.

April 9, 2009 at 2:20 PM  
Blogger Ellipses said...

Ooooh! Rosario Dawson!

Schwing!

Who am I kidding? Women are hot... even the ugly ones

April 9, 2009 at 2:27 PM  
Blogger Brant said...

I don't want to give away and plotlines, but I saw "Fast and Furious" yesterday (not a bad way to spend a couple of hours), and there was not nearly enough Michelle Rodriguez in it. Makes a guy want to have a drink.

April 9, 2009 at 2:36 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Jason Statham...that man can make me stop dead in my tracks. Julia Stiles always captures my attention. She's believable in every role she plays, and she always looks fabulous!

April 9, 2009 at 2:45 PM  
Blogger Ellipses said...

That chick that peels the banana with her feet...

Don't know what I'm talking about?
:-)
:-)
;-)

April 9, 2009 at 2:49 PM  
Blogger PRIguy said...

Wow...great topic, Brant. Where to begin? I have to agree with you on Flo the insurance chick. I don't know what it is, but I could work with it. SJP looks like a horse. No schwing possible there in my world. I absolutely cannot see the appeal of Kim Kardashian (although the chubby one and the younger one certainly pique my interest).

Really hot ones, off the top of my head:

Scarlett Johansson, Jessica Alba (although the bitch factor for her taints it some), Vanessa Hudgens (young, I know, but my God is she hot!), Kate Hudson, Christina Milian, Halle Berry, Jordana Brewster, Emily Deschanel (Zooey's older sister) Kelly Clarkson, and I'm sure I'll think of more as the day goes on.

"Stars" for no reason? Jamie Lynn Spears. Paris Hilton. The Kardashians. Anyone on Rock of Love. That stupid Octomom.

Secret crushes: Britney Spears. I thought she was hot the first time I saw her, loved her through the fat years, the meltdown years, the comeback years. I normally don't like blondes, so it's a mystery to me too. Paris Hilton. I think she has perfect breasts. And I know that she's a vapid, vacuous, STD-riddled skank, but something about her does it for me. Of course, I have to wash myself in bleach and lye afterwards.

I'm with you on Angelina Jolie, Cher.

April 9, 2009 at 3:55 PM  
Blogger Ellipses said...

Since you guys are so hot for Flo... what do you think about Kari from Mythbusters?

April 9, 2009 at 4:00 PM  
Blogger PRIguy said...

I haven't ever watched Mythbusters. But now I might.

Cameron Richardson is another gal that oozes sexuality. Remember that Hardee's commercial with the gal riding the mechanical bull while she ate a Hardee's burger as Foghat's "Slow Ride" played? It might not have aired up in PA, but it was in regular rotation during football season a few years ago here in Richmond.

April 9, 2009 at 4:18 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Why just "opposite" sex? Am I "abnormal"?

April 9, 2009 at 4:27 PM  
Blogger PRIguy said...

Didn't you read the other posts on the topic of gay marriage???

I'm sorry, but I just don't find men attractive. I can see where a woman could find some appeal in various men, but none of them make me want to switch teams.

April 9, 2009 at 4:33 PM  
Blogger Brant said...

Anonymous, feel free to go with the same-sex crushes. We're equal-opportunity lusters here. And as for Kari of Mythbusters (had to look her up), as Myron Cope would say, she's "okel dokel."

April 9, 2009 at 7:10 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Anon here. LOL! Of course I read the other post on gay marriage...big fan. Equal opportunity lusting is all I ask. ;-)

April 9, 2009 at 10:21 PM  
Blogger PRIguy said...

Lust away, anon. And please add Kari from Mythbusters to my list. Also, Sunny Anderson on FoodTV gets me, uh, kind of hungry...

April 10, 2009 at 6:30 AM  
Blogger Brant said...

There are a lot of reasons to watch the Food Network: Ingrid Hoffmann and Giada de Laurentiis come to mind. And Nigella Lawson is a fave. I think it's that accent. And you're right about Sunny, too.

April 10, 2009 at 7:42 AM  
Blogger PRIguy said...

I don't know how I forgot about Ingrid Hoffman! I think I could even learn to like cilantro for her.

I'm with you on Nigella. It's the accent, but she also ends her show with her sneaking to the fridge at night to snack on something. I like that for some reason.

April 10, 2009 at 8:31 AM  
Anonymous Joe Tuscano said...

I don't think I could pick just one, but I would say the family linage of Ingrid Bergman and Isabella Rossellini would be tough to beat.

April 10, 2009 at 9:07 AM  
Blogger PRIguy said...

Last year at a cookout, we went around the group and asked, "If you could have sex with anyone, past or present, who would it be?" My answer was Ingrid Bergman.

April 10, 2009 at 10:03 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Brant, i can't believe that you would even consider looking at another woman .... I have seen your wife. She is smokin'! I don't know how you even leave the house!
Shame on you.. !

April 10, 2009 at 10:46 AM  
Blogger Brant said...

Thanks for commenting, honey. And you're right. You light my fire. But it doesn't hurt to look for a little kindling. ;-)

April 10, 2009 at 10:48 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Anyone ever tell you that you are an ass?

April 10, 2009 at 10:50 AM  
Blogger Brant said...

Daily. And something tells me I'm not going to need to gather any kindling today. ;-)

April 10, 2009 at 10:58 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I grew up in the 80s and had tons of those one-page "posters" from Teen Beat, Tiger Beat, etc. up on the walls ... always had a huge crush on Matt Dillon. Still do; he's grown as an actor.

April 10, 2009 at 12:39 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm in love with Gwyneth Paltrow, Sigourney Weaver, Penelope Cruz and Maggie Gyllenhaal. But I will never, never, never understand why so many men seem to think Sarah Palin is hot. Not even in a sauna, Sarah.

April 10, 2009 at 11:17 PM  

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