On the local front

Some thoughts on a few local stories:

– An enterprising young fellow at California University of Pennsylvania are firing up a website designed to allow students interested in “hooking up” with other students to avail themselves of a sort of online free love clearinghouse. It bills itself as “safer than Craigslist and cheaper than bars.” My guess is that the vast, vast majority of those signing up will be horny male students doing some wishful thinking.

– Police in Charleroi have charged a local man with cruelty to animals after finding two pit bulls that had starved to death in cages in a home the man formerly lived in. One can only imagine the suffering those animals went through before they mercifully died. I'm hoping that a judge will make an example of 24-year-old Stanley McDonald and give him as much jail time as the charge allows, provided he is found guilty. I saw a friend or relative of McDonald's on TV claiming that McDonald thought a friend was going to take care of the dogs. Count me among those who think that is bull@#$%.

– I'm rarely surprised by anything Washington City Council does, but I was still puzzled by the story about the hiring of Ron McIntyre, a city police officer disabled in a fall during the 2006 fire at the George Washington Hotel, as the new city code enforcement officer. It's not that I have doubts about McIntyre's ability to do the job. It's the rate of pay for the duties being performed. The old code enforcement officer, Mike Behrens, made $41,000 a year. McIntyre will be making $35,000, but city solicitor Lane Turturice says his duties will only be about half that of Behrens. The solicitor says McIntyre will primarily be involved with rental registrations, while the action code enforcement will be done by fire Chief Linn Brookman and someone from North Strabane Township. Can someone explain to me why McIntyre will be paid nearly the same as Behrens for only half the work? That's a great job if you can get it.

What a schmuck

If you want a few laughs, reading about a sex scandal generally is not the first thing that comes to mind. But Louisville basketball coach Rick Pitino’s testimony last week in the case of a woman accused of trying to extort millions from him to keep quiet about a sexual encounter in a restaurant provided some moments of hilarity. I'm sure Pitino wasn't trying to be funny when talking about his dalliance with Karen Cunagin Sypher (shown above) in 2003, but it sure turned out that way. Here are a few paragraphs from an Associated Press story:

Pitino testified Wednesday that he meet Sypher on July 31, 2003, at the restaurant, where he had gone following a golf outing.
Pitino, who is married, said he bought Sypher a drink and the two exchanged small talk after the restaurant closed.
When he got up to leave, Pitino said she whispered something, unzipped his pants and the two had sex “very briefly.”
"Unfortunate things happen," Pitino said.

That's good comedy right there. I can just hear Pitino after his wife found out about the hanky-panky: "Well, honey, I was minding my own business in a restaurant when this lady unzipped my drawers and an ‘unfortunate thing’ happened.” I'm guessing Pitino didn’t think it was very unfortunate at the time. Or maybe he just thought it was unfortunate that the sex was very brief. But is that really something you want known? “Fastest Gun in the West” isn't a good nickname when you’re talking about things that go on behind closed doors. Bottom line: Pitino did something slimy, and Louisville, by continuing to employ him, has made it clear that wins on the basketball court, and money, are more important than having someone of good character leading the teenagers and early 20-somethings on the team.

Bums from both parties

I'm not sure which one of these guys is the most despicable, but Congressman Mark Souder and Connecticut Attorney General Richard Blumenthal are both on about the same level as whale poop. Let's start with Souder, shown in the bottom photo. Turns out, the "family values," evangelical Christian Republican from Indiana is a fraud. He's the latest member of the holier-than-thou-oops Hall of Shame. The hypocrite congressman, who said all the "right" things about gay people, abortion and abstinence couldn't keep his own pants on. Souder got caught having an affair with a female staff member, a staffer who once worked with him producing a video about the virtues of abstinence-only sex education. Hah. Nice. He has decided to resign and renew his "walk with the Lord." Souder might want to pick up the pace, because the Lord sure lost him on their last stroll. Then there's the sorry story of Blumenthal, who currently is running for the U.S. Senate in Connecticut. Blumenthal spoke on several occasions about his proud service with the Marines in Vietnam. Just one problem. He was never in Vietnam. In reality, Blumenthal was granted about a half-dozen deferments that enabled him to go to school at Harvard and a fancy school in England. When it finally looked as if was running out of deferments, he managed to snag a spot in the Marine Reserves, greatly reducing any chance of him ending up in the war zone. Blumenthal explained that he "misspoke" or "misplaced my words." Bull. He's a liar. Plain and simple. Blumenthal also said he wasn't going to allow anyone to "impugn my service." They don't have to, dummy. You did it yourself. And this is not scientific by any means, but when you look at the photos of these two sorry excuses for public servants, does the word "weasels" spring to mind? It did for me. Bottom line, Blumenthal has to be considered the most despicable. Souder is just the latest in a long line of "family values" frauds. He only hurt himself, the other woman and his family. Blumenthal has disgraced the memory of all those men and women who gave their lives by actually going to Vietnam. Anyone who votes for him should be ashamed of themselves.

This and that

A few subjects from the past week:

– After Ted Haggard, Sen. Larry Craig, Rep. Mark Foley and many more, we really shouldn't be too surprised when anti-gay ministers, activists and politicians find themselves in "interesting” positions, but a new story out of Florida is just too funny not to mention. The Miami New Times reports that George Alan Rekers, a co-founder of the Family Research Council and author of the book “Growing Up Straight: What Families Should Know About Homosexuality,” was spotted at an airport returning from a 10-day trip to London and Madrid with a young male prostitute. The escort, “Lucien,” described himself on the website rentboy.com as “sensual, wild and up for anything.” But Rekers said he didn't hire the young man for any of that gay sex stuff. No, siree. He explained to the newspaper that he was recovering from surgery and couldn’t lift luggage. Hence, the hiring of the young Puerto Rican gentleman. I guess tipping a porter or a bellhop just wouldn't do. Rekers, by the way, was supposedly pushing his and the young man’s suitcases when seen at the airport. But maybe that caused his condition to flare up, because Miami New Times reports that since that London-Madrid getaway, Rekers has reportedly e-mailed “Lucien” about a future trip to Rome. Apparently, the young fellow did a bang-up job of handling Rekers’ bag. Rekers’ name, by the way, has now been removed from the Family Research Council’s Internet site.

– I'm an “American Idol” fan, but I usually DVR the "results show” and watch it later so I can zip through not only the commercials but some of the “special” performances of current music stars that are part of the program. I wish I had not been subjected to last week’s offering by Lady Gaga, but the missus is a fan, so I unfortunately had to witness Ms. Gaga performing her new single, “Alejandro.” Mere words can hardly explain this entertainment spectacular. There were some half-naked men jumping about as if they had been Tasered at a Philadelphia Phillies game, and Ms. Gaga, herself, looked as if she had become entangled in a combination of giant spider webs, fish nets and a few of my late grandmother’s doilies. As for the "music,” I can only say that it would have been perfect for use as psychological torture against Guantanamo Bay detainees. And it went on, and on, and on. But it didn't go on long enough to suit Ms. Gaga, who reportedly was miffed that only about five minutes of her display was aired. I couldn't imagine sitting through any more of it, but I guess we missed something. And for that, I thank the producers of "American Idol.”

– I have long been of the opinion that our children are overscheduled. They have too many activities and not enough down time. But some high school football coaches want to make it even worse. A group of high school coaches met last week with Pitt coach Dave Wannstedt and his Penn State counterpart, Joe Paterno. And one purpose of the meeting was to win the college coaches’ support for allowing spring football practices for high school teams in Pennsylvania. Is it not enough that high school football players have to begin practice weeks before the start of the school year? Or that they put in hour upon hour upon hour of practice during the season? This is ridiculous. The kids are already making enough of a commitment of their time and effort to this sport. And what about those who might like to play a different sport in the spring? Are they just out of luck? Enough is enough.

Shooting the messenger

Is the pope beyond criticism? It's a question that bears asking after the virulent attacks by those associated with the Vatican against media and others who questioned the actions by the church and, particularly, Pope Benedict XVI in handling past incidents of child molestation by Catholic priests. Recent news reports might not provide the absolute "smoking gun" to show that Benedict was personally involved in a coverup of the sexual abuse cases, or at the very least of incompetence through inattention, but some of those guns seem very, very, very hot to the touch. The responses by those connected with the Vatican and Benedict paint a picture of some sort of anti-Catholic plot that really doesn't exist. And some of the statements defending them are ridiculous. On Tuesday, Italian Cardinal Giovanni Lajolo, an official of the Holy See, claimed Benedict and the church are targets of a hate campaign, and Spanish Cardinal Julian Herranz, leader of a Vatican discipline commission, says Benedict has become a target because of his opposition to abortion and same-sex marriage. The most unhinged remarks came from Benedict’s personal preacher, who likened criticism of the pope to the historic suffering of the Jewish people. All of these defenses seem to have the same goal: to launch a potentially chilling attack aimed at quieting those who would do no more than seek the truth in these cases while pointing out that the man holding the most powerful religious position in the world, during his years before assuming that post, might not have done all he could or, worse, deliberately looked the other way when rapes and other sex crimes were being committed against children. One would think that rank-and-file Catholics, as well as church leaders, would want answers. But very often, the response seems to be to blame those who raise the questions.

From the people who brought you slavery …

You can always count on the folks in Mississippi to try to drag the country back into the Dark Ages (or, in their case, maintain the status quo). A rural school district in the Jackson area has canceled the prom at Itawamba County Agricultural High School because a lesbian student wanted to wear a tuxedo and bring her girlfriend. The cowardly school board wouldn’t even admit the reason for its decision, saying only that the action was in response to “recent distractions.” But Constance McMillen, shown above, is certain that the board was targeting her for trying to upset the apple cart. McMillen told The Clarion-Register newspaper that “a bunch of kids at school are really going to hate me for this, so in a way it’s really retaliation.” The district issued a statement expressing its hope that “private citizens” will organize a prom. It didn’t mention whether the district hoped that those private citizens will harbor a deep and abiding hatred for gay people and keep them from mingling with the "normal" kids. We'll just have to read between the lines. I'm also guessing they have no objection to banjo-plucking inbreds coming to the prom together. First cousins? Fine and dandy. Brother and sister? That's just family togetherness. But gay people? No freakin' way. What’s sad is that most of Constance’s fellow students probably couldn’t care less whether she brings a female date. It's the adults who are making a mess of this. It’s like canceling recess for the whole class because one kid spoke without raising his hand. The district statement said board members made their ruling after “taking into consideration the education, safety and well-being of our students.” Say what? Education? Are they afraid that the students might learn that not everyone in the world is exactly like them? Safety and well-being? Are they afraid Constance or her date are going to pull a gun and force everyone to listen to Indigo Girls CDs and ditch their heels for more sensible shoes? Constance said the district told her that she and her girlfriend could not arrive at the prom together, that she couldn’t sport a tuxedo and that the couple might be asked to vacate the premises if their attendance at the prom made any other kids “uncomfortable.” What about students who might be uncomfortable with bigotry? I guess that’s not a concern.

How sincere

Troops are dying in Afghanistan, tens of millions of Americans are out of work and some nut flew a plane into an IRS building, but the BIG news this week is that Tiger Woods went before a TV camera and apologized for being lower than whale poop. The other night, with all that is going on in the world, ABC News' lead story was that Tiger was going to talk about his well-publicized, self-inflicted problems. Not that he WAS talking, but that he was GOING to talk. That's a sad statement about what passes for news judgment these days. And this wasn't even what one would typically consider to be a news conference. Tiger was going to read from a written statement and was refusing to answer any questions. It was all very self-serving, but most of the news media treated it as if Moses were coming down from the mountain to issue 10 more commandments. On Friday, Woods spoke for about 15 minutes. I can sum it up for you this way: Tiger is "deeply sorry" for his "irresponsible and selfish behavior." He has let us down. His wife didn't hit him with a 5-iron. He's not going to answer any questions about the status of his marriage. He's getting back into his Buddhist faith. He's going for more therapy. And he plans to return to golf someday. No @#$%, Sherlock. Does anybody really think Tiger is going to skip the Masters in April? Really, those were the only noteworthy statements in his entire speech. Only a handful of writers and a single TV camera were invited to this self-serving event. To its credit, the Golf Writers Association of America declined to send any of its members. Certainly, Woods has the right to set whatever ground rules he wants, but reporters don't have to be a part of the charade. The reaction of some media personalities was ridiculous. George Stephanopoulos of ABC said the speech was “one of the most remarkable public apologies ever by a public figure." Go overboard much, George? And golf analyst David Feherty of CBS said, "The vast number of people just want their Tiger Woods back." No, David. The vast majority of people really don't give a damn whether they ever see Tiger Woods again. Their lives just aren't that shallow. But CBS, I'll bet, really wants its Tiger Woods back, because he's the meal ticket for that network's golf coverage. I give credit to Rick Cerrone, the former public relations director of the New York Yankees. He saw through the BS and told CNN, "What I saw was arrogance. It was basically an infomercial." It's early, but I'd give the award for stupidest reaction to Debert Cook, publisher of African American Golfer's Digest, who said, "I think we are entering a whole new era spiritually and emotionally for Tiger Woods." Pardon me while I puke. The Onion gave the speech the gravity that it deserved, putting up a story with the headline, “Tiger Woods Announces Return to Sex." As always with Tiger Woods, it's all about Tiger Woods. And I'm guessing that I'm not the only one who believes that if Tiger hadn't gotten caught, he'd still be hitting the sack with as many cocktail waitresses as he could get his hands on.

Might as well face it, he's addicted to love (making)

If published reports are accurate, Tiger Woods, who was last seen thrashing about on the lawn of his Florida mansion last Thanksgiving under very sketchy circumstances, has checked himself into a private clinic for treatment of sex addiction. The reports aren't very clear on where the clinic is located. One report says Arizona, another South Africa. I guess this is Tiger's way of claiming that it wasn't his fault he ditched his trousers with the frequency of a porn actor. He had a sickness, don't you know, just like all those other celebrities who suddenly find a need for rehabilitation to get off booze or pills after they run their Hummer into a house or open up a can of whoop-ass on their significant other. People magazine, which claims Tiger is in an Arizona facility called The Meadows (I don't think Delvin Miller was involved with this one), cites a source who says the golfer “should be out by Valentine’s Day or thereabouts.” Yep, Valentine's Day. You can't make this stuff up.

Government waste alert!

I ran into something today that should have the teabagging crowd howling, but I'm guessing we won't hear a peep. Since they're all about railing against the wasting of tax money, I'd like to rally them to the cause of stopping the feds from spending $50 million a year on something that would produce the same return as flushing that money down a toilet. Sen. Orrin Hatch of Utah (no surprise there) is the sponsor of a bill that just cleared the Senate Finance Committee on a 12-11 vote. The measure would give $50 million annually to support abstinence-only sex education. Hatch says that approach works. Facts suggest otherwise. A study ordered by Congress two years ago showed that students who were in abstinence-only classes were just as likely to have sex as those who didn't. There also was a study showing that many of the kids who take those pledges to remain virgins until after marriage are perhaps technically accomplishing that by delving into oral and anal sex. So it would appear that Sen. Hatch is in favor of America's God-fearing kids going off the sexual "main menu" and, since good kids don't use condoms, subjecting themselves to all kinds of nasty diseases. At the same time, just as many of them will be having regular sex as kids who don't get the "just say no" instruction. And, of course, he wants to spend $50 million a year to accomplish this. Does that sound like good government?

Lewdy-ville

Consider this scenario: A married man with five children who works with young people, some as young as 17 or 18, has sex with a woman in a restaurant after a night of drinking and later antes up $3,000 so she can have an abortion. Do you think he'd be likely to lose his job? Not if he is ultra-successful Louisville basketball coach Rick Pitino. The coach has admitted that he had sex at a restaurant table after hours with Karen Sypher, a woman now accused of trying to extort money from Pitino after the sordid affair. A couple of weeks later, she came to him, said she was pregnant, expressed an interest in getting an abortion but said she didn't have health insurance to cover the procedure. Pitino coughed up $3,000. At a news conference Wednesday, he said he wasn't specifically paying for an abortion, just for health coverage for Sypher. Riiiight. It was just a coincidence that the health insurance was used to abort an allegedly Pitino-fertilized egg. While some allegations might be debatable, and others may be in dispute, the image Pitino is projecting now is that of an alcohol-fueled, scheming, abortion-buying adulterer. Is this the person you want leading the young men on a college basketball team? At Lousville, based on the statements of college leaders, that answer is a resounding "Yes!" This despite the fact that Pitino's contract has a morals clause that allows dismissal if the coach is guilty of moral depravity or puts the school in a bad public light. He's lucky there's not a clause regarding hypocrisy, because Pitino has always portrayed himself as a devout Catholic who even took a priest friend along on road trips as a spiritual adviser. But the "good folks" at Louisville are turning a blind eye to the coach's transgressions and figuratively wiping their behinds with the page of Pitino's contract that involves morality and common decency. After all, he wins lots of games and brings in big money to the school. And in college basketball, where elite players are gone almost as quickly as they arrive on campus, big-name coaches are the stars. If this were a second-year coach with a so-so win-loss record, he'd be gone quicker than you could say Jack Robinson. It would be ever-so-convenient for the powers to be at Louisville to send an underachieving coach packing without having to pay the rest of his contract while wringing their hands and lamenting his unconscionable moral failings. In America, we typically believe in giving our fellow man second chances. But some actions, by some people, are not forgivable, or shouldn't be. If an apprentice carpenter crafts a bad window frame, he deserves another chance. If you're a bank teller, and your cash drawer comes up short $50 one day, you deserve another chance. But if you're a newspaper reporter who deliberately submits a false story, you should be canned immediately. If you’re a county treasurer who pockets tax money, you should be fired and put on trial. And if you're a married father of five, and you engage in morally repugnant behavior with a stranger after a night of drinking, and then pay thousands of dollars to "clean up" your little mess, you should no longer be leading young people. We all fall short of leading the lives we should be leading, but certain jobs carry expectations of a higher standard of integrity and upstanding behavior. There are lines that cannot be crossed, behaviors that cannot be forgiven. Pitino has failed miserably in meeting those standards. But we are now a nation in which egregious crimes against morality that once brought harsh indignation are met with a shrug.

They're Philipping out

From the Can't-Take-a-Joke Department: It seems that the government of the Philippines is in full outrage mode because of a joking comment made by actor Alec Baldwin. In a recent appearance on David Letterman's talk show, Baldwin, whose unpleasant dealings with ex-wife Kim Basinger are well-documented, joked that he was "thinking about getting a Filipina mail-order bride ... or a Russian." And Letterman joked back, "Get one for me, for later." Well, it wasn't long, of course, before the video of the exchange was making the rounds on YouTube, and officials of the Philippines started demanding apologies. "Incidents of mockery against our race happen again and again. Again and again we must not fail in our strong condemnation and resounding assertion of our dignity," said Philippines Sen. Loren Legarda. "Let us make it clear to the world: Filipina women are not for sale. Not even for sale to Hollywood actors," she added. Another lawmaker went so far as to threaten to give Baldwin a knuckle sandwich if he dares show his face in the country. And the officials noted that the mail-order bride business is outlawed there. Really? A quick Yahoo! search for "Philippines mail order brides" turns up hundreds of thousands of responses. The main sponsor on the first page of the search results offers to hook you up with "Philippine ladies seeking love, dating and marriage." I'm guessing somebody has to be making a buck on this. After all the uproar, Baldwin might be leaning more toward a Russian woman. But he should be forewarned: Russian women seem to age about as well as unrefrigerated macaroni salad. Some of those 20-year-old Russian hotties gracing the Internet might very well end up looking like Janet Reno a few years down the road. And, you know, based on Baldwin's track record, maybe he'd just be better off with porn.

Trickle-down stupidity?

OK, boys and girls, listen carefully. Unwed mother Bristol Palin has some advice for you on how to avoid getting in the "family way." Of course, it's abstinence, which worked so well for her. Bristol gave an interview to ABC's "Good Morning America" in which she said that she wishes she had waited to have sex. I'll bet she does. She also offered this startling bit of information: "I just think that abstinence is the only way you can effectively, 100 percent foolproof way you can prevent pregnancy." Hold the presses. Do you mean that if you don't do the horizontal hokey-pokey, you can't get pregnant? This should solve everything in the area of teen pregnancy, right? Wrong! Even Bristol's baby daddy, who looked like a deer in the headlights when he was paraded around the Republican National Convention and learned that he would be getting married, knows better than that. Levi Johnston, now estranged from Bristol, said abstinence is "not realistic." Smart boy, at least in that regard. "Abstinence is a great idea," Johnston said in an interview with "CBS This Morning. "But I also think you need to enforce, you know, condoms and birth control and other things like that to have safe sex. I don't just think telling young kids, ‘You can’t have sex,’ it's not going to work." Perhaps he didn't say it eloquently, but Johnston is right on the money. We can talk all we want about abstinence being the best bet for our children. It is. There's really no denying that. But the reality, which some find to be an inconvenient truth, is that unmarried young people have been having sex with one another since the dawn of time, and they will continue to do so in large numbers as long as humans walk the Earth. What we have to do, as responsible people, is find the best ways of helping these children protect themselves from pregnancy and disease, and if they foul up, we should make sure that they have access to the morning-after pill. No, it shouldn't be used as a routine birth-control measure, but if a couple of kids screw up, no pun intended, the rest of their lives should not be ruined (and many are undeniably altered for the worse by an unintended pregnancy) when a simple trip to the drugstore could prevent it. Telling kids to just say no to sex is about as effective as telling the ground not to get wet when it rains. If Bristol Palin, a girl from a stable, well-to-do, loving, two-parent family who no doubt had her mother in her ear preaching abstinence for years, goes ahead and has unprotected sex, what are the odds that a girl from a poor, single-parent home with little hope for the future is going to buck the odds and keep her drawers on? We need to help our kids, and ourselves, by offering them more than empty words.